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positive no

What is a Positive No?

By slowly introducing a positive “no” into negotiations, a healthier kind of yes becomes possible too, making you a more effective negotiator.

The most challenging component of a good leadership style is saying no. But as expert negotiator William Ury has written, there is power in a “positive no.” Every day we find ourselves in situations where we need to say no—to people at work, at home, and in our communities—because it is the word we must use to stand up for what matters to us.

Although no can be both destructive and sometimes hard to utter, the word also “has the power to profoundly transform our lives for the better.” In fact, saying no can lay the foundation for valuable agreement.

A positive no is possibly the single most valuable skill in negotiation—and absolutely key to getting to yes. Whether it’s a practical need (like not missing dinner at home) or a fundamental principle, defining what we need to protect gives us strength and points the way to a constructive solution.

It’s also important to deliver a respectful no using a neutral, matter-of-fact tone that avoids a battle of wills. The no should be “empowered” with an alternative. For example, “I’m sorry I can’t do A, but perhaps I could do B, if that would help.” 

Don’t be afraid to negotiate a solution that protects your needs but also accommodates some of your counterpart’s key interests.

You can learn more about the power of a positive no and the art of negotiation in this free special report, Business Negotiation Strategies: How to Negotiate Better Business Deals, from Harvard Law School.

We will send you a download link to your copy of the report and notify you by email when we post new business negotiation advice and information on how to improve your dealmaking skills to our website.

The following items are tagged positive no:

Negotiating Skills: How to Bargain “Behind the Table”

Posted by & filed under Negotiation Skills.

After the fall of the Berlin Wall in 1989, U.S. president George H. W. Bush and his secretary of state, James Baker, were eager to win international support for German reunification and German membership in NATO. But Soviet president Mikhail Gorbachev faced strong opposition to these measures from members of his own Communist Party. Both … Read More 

Negotiation and Leadership: Dealing with Difficult People and Problems BR

Posted by & filed under executive training, Negotiation and Leadership - Live and Online.

Negotiation and Leadership Dealing With Difficult People and Problems Spring sessions: April 16–18 | May 14–16 | June 18–20 2018 Fall sessions: September 24–26 | October 15–17 | December 3–5 2018 Focused one-day sessions Spring sessions: April 19, 2018 | May 17, 2018 | June 21, 2018 Fall sessions: September 27, | October 18, | December 6, 2018

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“Negotiating at Work: Turn Small Wins into Big Gains”: A Book Talk with Deborah Kolb

Posted by & filed under Daily, Events.

The Program on Negotiation at Harvard Law School is pleased to present: Negotiating at Work: Turn Small Wins into Big Gains

with Deborah Kolb Professor Emerita, Simmons College School of Management Tuesday, November 17 4:00-5:15 PM Pound Hall 102 Harvard Law School Campus Free and open to the public; refreshments will be served.   About the book: Negotiation is undoubtedly essential to navigating the working world. Dr. … Read More 

Negotiation and Leadership: Dealing with Difficult People and Problems AQ

Posted by & filed under executive training, Negotiation and Leadership - Live and Online.

Negotiation and Leadership Dealing With Difficult People and Problems Spring sessions: April 16–18 | May 14–16 | June 18–20 2018 Fall sessions: September 24–26 | October 15–17 | December 3–5 2018 Focused one-day sessions Spring sessions: April 19, 2018 | May 17, 2018 | June 21, 2018 Fall sessions: September 27, | October 18, | December 6, 2018

.embed-container { position: relative; padding-bottom: 56.25%; height: 0; … Read More 

Negotiating the Path of Abraham: The Flip Side of the Middle East

Posted by & filed under Daily, Events.

The Abraham Path Initiative and the Program on Negotiation at Harvard Law School are pleased to present:

Negotiating the Path of Abraham: The Flip Side of the Middle East

with William Ury Co-author of “Getting to Yes” and co-founder of Harvard’s Program on Negotiation  and Dave Cornthwaite, Leon McCarron, Hannah Messerli, James Sebenius, and José Filipe Torres Saturday October 10 1:30-5 PM Milstein East B, Wasserstein Hall Harvard Law School Campus Free … Read More 

Negotiation and Leadership: Dealing with Difficult People and Problems

Posted by & filed under executive training, Negotiation and Leadership - Live and Online.

At Negotiation and Leadership, you will test your beliefs and assumptions, overcome emotional and rational biases, examine complex negotiation scenarios, and discover a range of competitive and cooperative negotiation strategies. In this acclaimed program, we compress 30 years of groundbreaking research into three thought-provoking days. In sessions taught by our expert faculty, you’ll broaden your … Read More 

PON Film Series presents “The Interrupters”

Posted by & filed under Conflict Resolution, Negotiation and Nonviolent Action, PON Film Series, Student Events.

The PON Film Series presents     “The Interrupters” followed by a post-screening discussion with William Ury, co-author of Getting to YES & Gary Slutkin, Executive Director of Chicago’s Ceasefire Date: Tuesday, November 15, 2011 Time: 6:30 PM Location: Ames Courtroom, Austin Hall, Harvard Law School Campus The Interrupters tells the moving and surprising stories of three Violence Interrupters who try to protect their Chicago … Read More 

Dr. Ury featured in Washington Post article on debt ceiling negotiations

Posted by & filed under Conflict Resolution.

In a recent article published in the Washington Post, Dr. William Ury, co-founder of the Program on Negotiation, suggests that Republicans and Democrats hammering out a deal on the national debt ceiling could benefit from the experience of negotiators. Professional negotiators know that certain tactics can backfire in tense situations.  Issuing ultimatums, publicly criticizing your counterpart, … Read More 

Getting to No

Posted by & filed under Daily, Negotiation Skills.

Adapted from “When You Mean No, Say So!” first published in the Negotiation newsletter. Too often, we say yes when we shouldn’t. Wanting to be team players at work, we postpone a family vacation. Or we pitch in on a community project when we have no time for it. In the short term, we please whoever … Read More 

Boost your negotiations skills and confidence

Posted by & filed under Daily, Negotiation Skills, Resources, Reviews of Books.

The following book, Negotiation Genius, was co-winner of the 2008 CPR Award for Excellence in ADR (Outstanding Book Category).  It provides clear and methodical advice for preparing for and executing any negotiation, drawing on decades of behavioral research and the experience of thousands of business clients. Whether you’ve “seen it all” or are just … Read More