identity conversation

PON Staff   •  02/17/2009   •  Filed in Glossary

The part of a “difficult conversation” that we have with ourselves about what a problematic situation means to us. This conversation is an internal debate about who we are and how we see ourselves. (Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton and Sheila Heen, Difficult Conversations [Viking/Penguin, 1999], 8,14) … Read More 

identity

PON Staff   •  02/17/2009   •  Filed in Glossary

The way people see themselves – the groups they feel a part of, the significant aspects of themselves that they use to describe themselves to others. Some theorists distinguish between collective identity, social identity, and personal identity. However, all related in one way or another to a description of who one is, and how one … Read More 

frame

PON Staff   •  02/17/2009   •  Filed in Glossary

The story or narrative each bargainer tells herself about the negotiation. Your frame in a negotiation reveals how you understand what you and the other bargainer are negotiating and what you think the task ahead is. (Robert H. Mnookin, Scott R. Peppet and Andrew S. Tulumello, Beyond Winning [Belknap Press, 2004], 207) … Read More 

feelings conversation

PON Staff   •  02/17/2009   •  Filed in Glossary

The part of a “difficult conversation” that asks and answers questions regarding feelings and emotions. (Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, Sheila Heen, Difficult Conversations [Viking/Penguin, 1999 ], 7) … Read More 

facilitator

PON Staff   •  02/17/2009   •  Filed in Glossary

A professional trained to help parties negotiate productively. The role of a facilitator may vary, but in most cases they are responsible for keeping the conversation on track and communication open. (Lawrence E. Susskind and Jeffrey L. Cruikshank, Breaking Robert’s Rules [Oxford University Press, USA, 2006], 27) … Read More 

empathy loop

PON Staff   •  02/17/2009   •  Filed in Glossary

A technique to demonstrate understanding and empathy with another party. The empathy loop has three steps: (1) Inquire about a subject or issue, (2) the other side responds, and (3) you demonstrate your understanding of the response and test or check that understanding with the other person. In other words, you loop your understanding of … Read More 

empathy

PON Staff   •  02/17/2009   •  Filed in Glossary

Demonstrating an understanding of the other side’s needs, interests, and perspective, without necessarily agreeing. … Read More 

dovetailing differences

PON Staff   •  02/17/2009   •  Filed in Glossary

A term that refers to identifying differences in interests or priorities among the parties in a negotiation, and making strategic decisions based on these differences in order to create value. (David A. Lax and James K. Sebenius, 3-D Negotiation [Harvard Business School Press, 2006], 125) … Read More 

accommodating

PON Staff   •  02/17/2009   •  Filed in Glossary

An approach to negotiation that emphasizes empathy over assertiveness. Accommodating negotiators prize good relationships, and display concern, compassion, and understanding in a negotiation. They may negotiate in order to resolve differences quickly, and typically listen well but may be too quick to give up on their own interests when they sense that relationship is threatened. … Read More 

adjudicative proceedings

PON Staff   •  02/17/2009   •  Filed in Glossary

A method of dispute resolution that decides the legal rights of specific persons in order to settle or determine a dispute. Unlike mediation, adjudicative proceedings (i.e., litigation, arbitration, or mediation-arbitration) relinquish control of the legal process to a third party neutral who then determines the rights and obligations of the parties involved. … Read More 

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