Negotiation is not only something we do at work; often the toughest negotiations we encounter are in our personal lives. In a recent Wall Street Journal ^[1] article, Daniel Shapiro, Associate Director of the Harvard Negotiation Project and a faculty affiliate with the Program on Negotiation, offers some suggestions on how negotiation skills can be used to repair friendships that are strained or broken. To start, suggests Shapiro, don’t assume that the other party is going to be ready right away to return to a close relationship. By listening closely to the concerns and feelings expressed by a friend, and understanding their perspective, one can begin to rebuild trust, a key component in any relationship.

In his book, Beyond Reason: Using Emotions as You Negotiate ^[2], Shapiro emphasizes that understanding the other party’s key concerns is essential when negotiations involve powerful emotions. When both parties understand these core concerns, emotions can become an asset rather than an obstacle to negotiation. This is as true in personal negotiations as it is when dealing with high-stakes international conflict.

To read The Wall Street Journal article, click here ^[1].

Professor Shapiro ^[3] will be teaching a one-day author session in December 2011, based on his book, Beyond Reason: Using Emotions as You Negotiate. For information on attending this course, or our three-day Program on Negotiation for Senior Executives, visit our courses and trainings page ^[4].